February 4: Against what do you measure your identity? What do you compare yourself to?
March 15, 2008 by chantellesthoughts
Many young teens today, compare themselves to other people such as TV stars, friends, etc. Who you compare yourself to can play a huge part in your identity.
Personally I tend to compare myself to people or are skinnier, prettier or nicer in general. Lots of people continually tell that I am perfect the way I am, but yet, No one is perfect! Whenever I see celebritys on T.V. or in magazine, or any form of media, I don’t look at them for why they are being interviewed, I look at them and compare them to me. How much skinnier they are, or how much more prettier they are. Whatever flaw I can find within me I compare it to other people who don’t have that flaw. http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2006/12/12/why-you-should-not-compare-yourself-to-others/
When I compare myself to others, it doesn’t help when people in society (not everyone, but mainly the ones that I see everyday or often) look at me and point out every flaw. It bothers me so bad, that I just want to give up. Sometimes I wonder if my identity is based on just my flaws. Everyone seems to make an entire list of it, usually of all bad stuff that I hate, and rag on me. I hate hearing the words, ‘fat ass’, ‘ugly’, ‘your not worth it’, etc. I know some of them may be taken too far, but it still burns.
When people judge others, the victim likely will compare themselves to other people. In reality however, the person you compare yourself too, may be going through the same problems in life you are.
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Hey Chantelle!
You are as close to perfect as anyone else is, don’t be so hard on yourself!
I do agree with you though on how influential the media is, and how easy it is to be buying groceries and see the magazines and think “I wish I could look like that!” But then again, I don’t think I’d want to be famous and popular like some of those women, because their flaws get absolutely picked apart too. All of their personal problems get flaunted in the media, and when they loose or gain weight, or have a kid, or break up with their boyfriends, or whatever, it all gets super analyzed by everyone! That would suck too, don’t ya think?
And it’s also true how it’s not fair for others to judge, because realistically someone else is judging them at the exact same time.
Chantelle,
Here is another comment from me! This was also another great blog, and many of your points are so true. “Whatever flaw I can find within me I compare it to other people who don’t have that flaw.” This exact part I can relate to a lot. I completely understand what you feel when you see someone like this on TV or in a magazine. In my blog I related to many of the points you related to. It truly is hard to compare yourself to others that you want to be like.. although that can never be a good thing. Just be who you are and let people like you for the qualities you have.. don’t change for anyone!